Young Americans are getting married older. According to data from Bowling Green State University, the average marriage age for women is 28.6 years old, while the average age for men is 30.5 years old. Both sexes’ average age has increased about two years since 2008.
According to the Institute for Family Studies (IFS), “the vast majority (93%) of young adults under age 35 are either married or open to marriage.” However, the challenge to having a family is not primarily money or career, according to IFS data, it’s finding the right person; that reason holds even across socio-economic backgrounds.
Father Paul Sullins, Senior Research Associate at the Ruth Institute, thinks part of the challenge is “social disintegration.” “ Everybody in our society lives in their own little silo communicates with people like themselves on social media or in other ways,” he told Drew Mariani.
Cultural Factors
Sullins also thinks delays in marriage is a cultural issue. “ We do not as a culture hold up an ideal of getting married.” Sullins told Drew that a century ago, young people would be given instruction about “how to get married and how to function in a marriage relationship.”
IFS cites the belief in a ‘soulmate’ as an inhibiting factor in marriage. A YouGov poll from 2021 showed 60% of American believe in soulmates. However, sociologist Brad Wilcox says couples who believe marriage is about both kids and romance have a better chance of staying together than those who believe in soulmates. According to Wilcox, “Being committed for the long-term has a powerful influence on husbands’ and wives’ willingness to serve the best interest of the couple rather than the short-term interest of the self.”
In-Person and Intentional
One solution to help couples find the right person is in-person intention dating. While Sullins see the positive impact dating apps can have, he stressed the need for “intentional dating, and noted that some college “have even started courses in dating.”
The positive impact of in-person meeting is born out in the data. Marital satisfaction is highest for those who met at Church or a religious activity (75%) compared to 61% who met online.
Pope Leo XIV
Recently, during his address to young people in Indianapolis, the Holy Father stressed the need to open one’s heart to God. “The world needs holy families who pass on the faith and show God’s love in daily life. If you think you may be called to marriage, pray for a spouse who will help you grow in holiness, help you grow in your faith,” the Pontiff said.
The Augustinian Pope quoted St. Augustine as a model for this openness, “Lord, give me the grace to do what you ask and then ask whatever you want.”