How to help your significant other grow in faith

Not being on the same page with your spouse or significant other when it comes to the importance of your faith can put a strain on any relationship. Even if you’re both Catholic, it can be difficult when one is more fervent in their beliefs than another. What can you do to even out the divide?

“My significant other and I, we’re both Catholic but we’re not on the same page as maybe we’d all like to be. But I’m just curious on what your thoughts are on getting somebody who might be a lapsed Catholic or somebody who may not be going to Church a lot, to get them more excited to grow deeper in their faith together? Because I feel like that would be a good way for us to grow our relationship together,” asked Dominic on Father Simon SaysTM.

“Well, I’d go slow, I’d be careful because you don’t want to be unequally yoked. And it’s interesting that … this is in the Bible, I’d have to look it up, but this is Saint Paul; I’m paraphrasing of course: It’s easier for a good woman to convert a bad man than for a good man to convert a bad woman. I’m not saying your beloved is a bad woman, but she’s not as interested in her relationship to the Lord as you are. And this is what I would suggest—I would say, ‘Would you mind praying with me? … Real simple, just let’s hold hands and say the Our Father when we part at night, you know, when we go our separate ways. I would just like to say a little prayer with you, would you mind that?’ If she says, ‘I don’t want to pray with you!’ Well, then I would worry,” replied Fr. Richard Simon.

It’s about helping your significant other come to know God on a more personal level, and not just as an idea. “Evangelism is getting someone to say ‘thou’ or ‘you’—second person to the Lord. Talking about God? Meh, I can think of lots of good reasons not to be Christian when you talk about God, but when you talk to God and he shows up, that’s difference. You’ve got to introduce her to Christ, not convince her of Christ,” said Fr. Simon.

Taking small steps is key to helping someone along in their relationship with Christ. “When she gets used to a little hand-holding and saying the Our Father, then you could say, ‘Lord, I ask you to bless my schnuckiputzi’—which is, of course, German for sweetheart—but ‘I ask you to bless schnuckiputzi and give her a wonderful night’s sleep and help her in her life.’ And she’s going to melt. That’s the approach I would take … and, have her listen to Relevant Radio, why not! Have it on in the car when you’re going places. She may warm up to that.”

Lindsey is a wife, mother, and contributing author at Relevant Radio. She holds a degree in Journalism and Advertising from the University of Wisconsin-Milwaukee. Lindsey enjoys writing, baking, and liturgical living with her young family.