Help! My husband won’t go to Mass.

Does your spouse share your Catholic faith? Or do you feel like you’re on this journey alone, with a spouse who is apathetic about practicing the Faith or even who actively works against you?

Mariela is a new listener to The Patrick Madrid Show and has been listening every day since her sister encouraged her to tune in. She called Patrick for advice.

“I definitely feel like I’ve gotten away from my faith, and I need help mainly because I want my husband to be there with me. I want him to start going to church on Sundays. It’s been such a struggle to convince him to go because there’s always an excuse,” she explained.

Patrick spoke about St. Paul’s warning against being unequally yoked, acknowledging that her effort to grow deeper in faith and encourage that faith in her children is “hard when your husband is not pulling in the same direction with you.”

He encouraged Mariela to have a very honest conversation with her husband about how she is feeling.

“Let him know that. Tell him, ‘We’re in it to win it. And this marriage of ours is our means of getting to heaven … and our kids are with us on this journey.’”

Patrick spoke about the reality that if her husband is not practicing the faith and going to Mass, her kids would almost certainly leave the faith as well. “Let him know that he is setting up his kids—your kids—for a disaster down the road if he doesn’t take into account the role that he plays as the spiritual leader of the family.”

Ultimately, it will take more than Mariela’s encouragement to bring her husband back into the faith.

“It has to be heartfelt, and that means that he has to have an encounter with Jesus Christ,” explained Patrick. “He has to understand at some point that Jesus died for his sins, that Jesus established the Church for his salvation … but all of this other stuff may not make any sense until he first realizes who Jesus Christ is and what Jesus did for him and wants to do for him.”

These kinds of encounters and conversions can’t be forced. Patrick encouraged Mariela to keep praying, keep giving a good example, and persevere in encouraging her kids and her husband to join her even if she doesn’t see any change right away.

Listen to the full discussion:


Tune in to The Patrick Madrid Show weekdays at 8-11am CT only on Relevant Radio.

Lindsey is a wife, mother, and contributing author at Relevant Radio. She holds a degree in Journalism and Advertising from the University of Wisconsin-Milwaukee. Lindsey enjoys writing, baking, and liturgical living with her young family.