Anyone who has ever parented a toddler knows the “I-do-it-myself” phase. The stage when that tiny human is so desperate for independence that they absolutely insist on doing everything on their own. They refuse help from a parent, grandparent, or sibling because they just want to feel a little bit more in control of their own life.
The problem is, they aren’t ready to do everything themselves. They don’t have the fine motor skills to tie their shoelaces, but they try anyway. They don’t have the strength to lift a bag of groceries, but oh boy, they will give it their all. They want to sweep the floor for you but end up making an even bigger mess. They have the will power, but they might not have the skills necessary to accomplish everything they put their mind to.
For a first time (or even a seasoned) parent, it can be a bit exasperating. When you are late for an appointment and your 2-year-old refuses to let you help him put on his shoes or zip his coat, you wish he would just give in. But four toddlers later, I’ve learned that it’s all part of the process, a stepping-stone on the way to actual independence. And all too quickly, that little child won’t need you to do everything for them.
Although I’m certainly not a model of perfect patience every time, I’ve learned to sit back and let my toddlers have a shot at their ambitious plans. I might leave a few minutes earlier because I know my daughter will insist on attempting to buckle her carseat harness by herself—and then after failing for several minutes, she might relent and let me do it.
As I’ve become a more seasoned mother, I’ve had more time to notice and enjoy each stage of childhood and parenthood. And I’ve had more time to reflect on God’s parenthood of us. While I’m tempted to lose my cool when my child repeatedly does something frustrating or illogical, I’ve come to realize that I do those exact same things to my Heavenly Father.
How many times have I insisted on doing it myself when God has asked me to lean on Him? How often have I relied only on my own flawed knowledge or feeble strength rather than trusting the one who knows it all? I know that I often dig my heels in rather than surrender to His plans.
And how patiently He waits for me. How lovingly does he guide me, nudge me, and lead me to the truth.
If you’ve ever prayed the Litany of Trust, you’re probably familiar with the line, “From the false security that I have what it takes, deliver me, Jesus.” At first I wasn’t sure what to make of it. After a lifetime of teachers and inspirational posters saying “believe in yourself”, praying for the opposite feels a little odd.
But truly it’s an invitation to know and believe that we NEED Jesus. We can’t do it on our own, and we shouldn’t try to. We really, truly need help from God in everything we face. And that doesn’t make us weak, it makes us strong—in hope, in faith, in trust, and in love.
Relevant Radio is celebrating 25 years of walking with you and lifting you up so that you don’t ever feel like you have to do this alone. To celebrate, we are offering a very special premium on this Monday of our summer pledge drive. One day only — August 18, 2025 — when you donate $25 a month (total of $300 for the year) we will send you a very special Relevant Radio 25th Anniversary blanket! And to make things even sweeter, your gift today will be matched 100%! Don’t miss the chance to get one of these special 25th anniversary blankets and have your gift matched to make twice the impact in the lives of others.
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